maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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