No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
