i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
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