I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
You were trust falling into bushes
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
