We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
