She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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