i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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