chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
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