Will you blow on my dice?
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
