he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
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