Kiss
Puke
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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