If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
