was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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