This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I wish i was in the wii world.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Randomize
