Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
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