dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
