He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
