You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
