i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
