We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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