we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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