He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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