Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
