why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
