Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
