well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
