How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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