i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I think a kid would responsible me up
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
