At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Randomize
