marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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