All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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