How'd it feel making her break her religion?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
