hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Randomize
