Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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