party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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