i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
where am i from again
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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