he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize