You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
you didnt know i had herpes?
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
