Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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