i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
