Welp...herpes.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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