U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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