This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
