i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
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