That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
