just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
