So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
