Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
