she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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