If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Randomize